why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
