hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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