i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
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