you guys were way drunker than both of me
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
