Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
