I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
