I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
