he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
