I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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