I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
