You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
