I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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