Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
