D3 body, D1 cock
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
