thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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