Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I understand Curling. That high.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
