Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
How naked do you want me to be?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
