We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
