Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
