His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
