my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
