Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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