We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
