Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
