just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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