Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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