YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
