So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
