Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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