Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
