morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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