Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he thought i was a dude.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Randomize
