Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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