Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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