So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
