My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
