Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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