You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize