I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize