ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Randomize
