Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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