if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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