I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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