Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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