I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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