DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
