I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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