im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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