didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
