So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
