Cold hands, warm shart.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
